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Next Window Please

by Shampoo Drive-Thru

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1.
Midnight Roomba 03:21
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Wake up! Wake up! Now! Someone’s in the house! Gotta get-- gotta get ‘em out! Go fetch your bats! Pow! Put the kids to bed, project some Zs from my head When a crash awoke me from my slumber Grab your favorite weapons, kids, there’s someone downstairs Let’s show these invaders to their doom It’s a call to action, we’ve gotta defend our domain Belt your battle cries, we’re gonna… we’re gonna maim We track ‘em by the sound, rearing to pound They were nowhere to be found Then we look… then we look down… down Wake up! Wake up! Now! Someone’s in the house! Gotta get-- gotta get ‘em out! Go fetch your bats! Pow! Wake up! Wake up! Now! Someone’s in the house! Gotta get-- gotta get ‘em out! Go fetch your bats! Pow! Falling to the ground, I cursed in pain Turning back around, I see a… I see a face “How does cleaning make you feel?” He’s got my attention “And I’ve got a real, real good deal” The sales rep says to me, “Would you like to buy a Midnight Roomba? It’ll roam your house while you sleep” It’s a call to action, we’ve got to defend our domain Belt your battle cries, we’re gonna…(*battle cry*) we’re gonna maim Wake up! Wake up! Now! Someone’s in the house! Gotta get-- gotta get ‘em out! Go fetch your bats! Pow! Wake up! Wake up! Now! Someone’s in the house! Gotta get-- gotta get ‘em out! Go fetch your bats!
2.
Space Extradition 03:30
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Me with my spaceships You with your kickflips He with his clearance He's exposing all our secrets You with your bushy beard He with his scruff scruff Me with my bare chin On Rogan going puff puff La. La La La. La La La. La La Laaa We are on a mission You're facing extradition I'm colonizing Mars Come join the expedition Leaving from Los Angeles I pick him up in Moscow We grab you from the embassy Then take off from Orlando We touchdown in Cassini Just us three amigos But someone got here first Jeffrey Preston Bezos?! La. La La La. La La La. La La Laaa We are on a mission They’re facing extradition We’re colonizing Mars Come join the expedition He sits upon a throne Sipping Basics wine This mogul must have known This real estate is prime He with his billions We with our philosophy He's flying through the solar system Planting flags from A to Z La. La La La. La La La. La La Laaa When I blew the whistle at the C.I.A. They were spying on their people, I just had to get away So, I settled down in Russia and asylum they did grant The Kremlin will not silence me when I go on a rant This is a message to the people, to look up from your screens The shipping isn’t free if you pay a yearly fee! Who’s the guy we hate the most? Jeffrey Preston Bezos Who's killing jobs from coast to coast? Jeffrey Preston Bezos Who's building a monopoly? Jeffery Preston Bezos Who sells me stuff that spies on me? Jeffrey Preston Bezos
3.
Shampoo Drive-Thru 03:58
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Bubble, bubble Shave my stubble Trim and a shampoo on the double Wrap my face in a fresh hot towel Make it quick or I don’t know how I’ll Get to the chapel on time To pronounce them husband and wife Shampoo Drive-Thru! How can I help you? Trim and a shampoo? Sure! Next window please We are your brand new hairdo pit crew Want to meet the new you? Next window please. Slide into my back seat Trim and comb my hair Lather rinse but don’t repeat I’ve got to be somewhere The marquee reads Satisfaction Guaranteed Come on back for more Your tenth visit is free Shear, Shear Lower these ears Braid my hair and dry my tears All eyes are on me today And I just want to run away I’m not ready to wear this dress My heart’s beat- beat- beating out of my chest Shampoo Drive-Thru! How can I help you? Something’s bugging you? Next window please We are here to make your worries disappear So, tell us all your fears. Next window please Move a little faster I’m already late This is a disaster Why did I get bangs? Slide into my back seat Blow dry my hair Aim it at these cold feet I hope he doesn’t care Bowl cut Dreadlocks A mohawk with Mutton Chops Pigtails and a skin fade A buzz cut with side bangs Comb over, Top-knot rattail with a flat top Beehive, Cowlick Afro with a mullet Pompadour with a french twist Jheri curls with frosted tips
4.
Easter Monday Cleanup Crew 03:38
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I’ve got a mop, you fetch a broom if you keep up, you can come too tell the band we’ll be there soon with the Easter Monday Cleanup Crew after Peter’s yearly rampage, who knows what to do when you’re soaked in blood after the holiday we’ve got hazmat suits limbs and entrails dangle from the trees, reach them if you can a vacuum cleaner won’t clear this debris, we need a dust pan pink grass won’t grow where does it come from, who knows these eggs, we throw when they hit ground they explode Pick up your mic, we’ll make some room if they don’t move, we know what to do break the handle off that broom start swinging for the cleanup crew Oh no Explode we throw won’t grow after peter’s yearly rampage, who knows what to do when you’re soaked in blood after the holiday, we’ve got hazmat suits limbs and entrails dangle from the trees, reach them if you can a vacuum cleaner won’t clear this debris, we need a dust pan pink grass won’t grow where does it come from, who knows these eggs, we throw when they hit ground they explode I’ve got a mop, you fetch a broom if you keep up, you can come too tell the band we’ll be there soon we're the Easter Monday Cleanup Crew
5.
Stranger Danger 03:13
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Mom sent me out to get groceries For our mega-awesome, super cool party “Well, I’m out the door, see you later!” When dad yells back, “Hey, Son! Don’t talk to strangers!” I pull into the parking lot When I hear a KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK “Hey, Honey. Have you got the time?” “Yes, ma’am. It’s eleven forty-five.” I’ve got a lot of things on my list I really don’t have time for this “So, what do ya say, wanna gimme a ride?” “Yeah, sure. Hurry up, get inside.” Driving home my back seat full of mostly groceries I just can’t get my mind off the festivities This party’s gonna be the bomb With me my dad-- and my mom Playing game after game after game of soda pong Pulling into my driveway When we hear a BANG BANG BANG “Hey, kid! Wanna help me hide a body?” “Yeah, sure. You can bring it to my party.” Come on in, kick off your shoes And get lost in the red balloons How many strangers did you bring Strangers did you bring Hey! Is that a dead body? This is a terrible thing A terrible thing These people aren’t welcome at my party
6.
Relish The Dish 03:24
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Catch up with us You’re ahead of the curve Must herd the word The flock is out-numbered Relish the dish It’s freshly found fish Fried on the fifth For the family picnic call in take out I haven’t eaten in days Like a curb check cashed On ice cream sundae My solitary salivary Gland just joined the military Juvenile jelly beans Detonate my destiny It’s a the end of all humanity Fertile ground for filthy fantasy No you haven’t, no you haven’t No you haven’t heard the last of me Give up, Dig in Take a stab at the earth tick tock, clock in time to measure your worth don’t misbehave I’ll dance on the grave there’s no time to save better get out of my way Give up Let go take a seat next to me how better to go than solo commando flip that frown back upside down there’s safety six feet under ground there’s no telling what we’ll do but we know she’s tomorrows’ food We’re born, we eat, we die Fish swim, they’re caught, and they’re fried Grow a spine and cast your line the grown ups cry as the children lie We’re born, we eat, we die Fish swim, they’re caught, and they’re fried Grow a spine and cast your line the grown ups cry as the children lie It’s the end of all humanity Fertile ground for filthy fantasy No you haven’t, no you haven’t No you haven’t heard the last of me
7.
Awful Apple Waffle 03:16
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Hey there, Mister. You look hungry. I know a great place in the city. We can grab an UberX. Me? I always choose Select. We can go for breakfast or brunch It doesn’t matter much If you want a side salad or jam and toast Don’t you worry, this place serves both We could get some coffee But me, I really, really, really prefer tea I would sip some coffee You know, if you’ll stir it for me Let’s stay for dinner, my friend Surge pricing kicks in at ten Afterward we’ll have a bath Spaghetti and meatballs in our laps Then we’re back tomorrow for lunch This server’s my new crush I’ll have an awful apple waffle with an iced tea If only she’ll serve it to me Please don’t tell Chris Farley That what he’s drinking isn’t really coffee He’ll start a rage in this place You’ll get a pie in the face What’s in those pies Is it pecan? Is it lemon meringue? Is it grapefruit? Is it cherry pie? Is it minced-meat? Is it sweet potato? Is it rhubarb? Banana cream? Is it you? Is it me? Oh, what could it be? I don’t care what’s in those pies? I just want to get it out of my eyes
8.
Spooky Shoes 02:41
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I lift my nose, my feet don't stink This feels wrong, but I ain't no shrink Looking down, I finally see what is missing to be complete I'm a ghost with no cause a specter without a heart but still the worst part is my shoes don't fit They phase right through me Why can't my death be worry free Nooo! I hate this My shoes don't stay on my feet
9.
My Mongoose Made Me Do It 03:28
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I’m a high priest in a cult Witchcraft and spells all day There’s a creature I consult How did I get this way? I’ll tell you! My mongoose made me do it It approached me in disguise Hypnotized me with its eyes Forfeit this battle of wits It claimed me as its prize I can’t stay out of trouble Due to our little game Causing nations to crumble I won’t take any blame B-B-B-B- Because my mongoose made me do it It approached me in disguise Hypnotized me with its eyes It demands obedience So I whisper my goodbyes Ooo, I can't believe it I crashed into your bushes I’ve got twigs stuck between my ears and now I can't stop the tears My mongoose made me do it Embezzling all those funds Corrupting all the nuns My mongoose made me do it Poisoning a tasty stew Stealing granny’s new shampoo My mongoose made me do it Counterfeiting Benjamins Sucker-punching all your friends My mongoose made me do it
10.
For Starters, I'll Have Seconds 04:34
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Good Morning, Grandma Did you hear the news? I found the perfect side for your favorite stew If you like it I could bring it to you From the good old days of 2002 It’s like a liquid So viscous you Could scoop it with a slotted spoon Do you know, do you know How to find the groove? Back it up! Back it up To this funky tune Into a black hole We’re dancing feet first Through a wormhole Across the universe Into a black hole We’re sliding feet first Through a wormhole Across the universe Good evening, hostess Please don’t stare When we come from this is stylish hair We’ve come a long way From some ancient fare A dish for which our people Don’t much care How do you make this? Please write it there You are the patron saint Of answered prayers Oh no I hope that We have the right cookware Okay. So long. Thank you. Take care. Into a black hole We’re dancing feet first Through a wormhole Across the universe Angel voices sing As the buffet beckons Can we help you please For starters, I’ll have seconds One scoop now and two to-go Gravy flows from the heavens More flavor than I’ve ever known I’ve lost count of my blessings Into a black hole We’re dancing feet first Through a wormhole Across the universe Into a black hole We’re sliding feet first Through a wormhole Across the universe

credits

released November 1, 2021

Bryan Bednarek: vocals, guitar, keys
Ken Fritz: keys, guitar, drum programming, vocals
Louis Dellorto: bass, vocals

Mixed and mastered by Rob Ruccia, Uptown Recording

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Shampoo Drive-Thru Chicago, Illinois

Cutting through the cover bands to deliver original music to Chicagoland and beyond, Shampoo Drive-Thru is a high-energy synth-rock trio. Inspired by Oingo Boingo, DEVO, and the B-52's, their unique music style is sure to leave you entertained and begging for more. ... more

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